Laugh laugh and laugh ur Ass off!!!

Discussion in 'Chit-Chat' started by ☀Ã, Oct 14, 2011.

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ok here are nice update!!! Very funny laugh and forget ur sorrowzzz-
    1.At a launching
    ceremony an illiterate chief noticed that each
    dignitary making a donation had 2 titles
    attached 2 his name. E.g Chief(Dr) John
    Obi,Prof(Pastor) etc. Determined not 2 allow
    anyone upstage him @ d occasion,when it
    was his turn 2 speak,he said I late(chief) Ken
    Okor, Arusi 1 donate d sum of 5million cash.
    Late who? ....the hall was empty in less than
    60secs.
    2.Adebisi A farmer saw
    a plane full of politician crashed near his
    farm.:( When police came 2 d scene D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̲̣̣̥
    asked d farmer what happened?
    FARMER: dey crashed in my farm & I buried
    dem.
    POLICE: Are u sure Dey were all dead?
    FARMER: Some of dem said they're still alive,
    but u know how politicians lie, so I didn't
    believe dem. lolzzzzzzz
    3.PSALM 23 (NAIJA
    VERSION)
    1. The Lord na my shephard, i dey Gidibaaa.
    2. E make me sidon for where betta dey flow
    and come put me next to stream make mai
    bodi thermacool.
    3. E panel beat mai soul come spray am
    white, come dey lead me dey go through
    express road of righteousness sake of Hin
    name.
    4. Walahi, if I waka pass where arm robber,
    419 and juju people boku, come even join
    okada reach valley ......of the shadow of death
    sef, mai bodi dey inside cloth. Your rod and
    staff nko ? Na so dem dey like back bone dey
    comfort me.
    5. You don prepare Egusi and Pounded yam
    make I chop. All mai enemies dey look waa
    waa. You rub me for head wit vaseline
    intensive lotion. mai cup na River Niger wey
    overflow hin bank.
    6. True true, betta life and mercy go gum mai
    back till I quench. And man pikin go tenda
    for God house from lai lai to lai lai.
    GOD ALMIGTHY NA YOU BIKO
    AMEN... Brb

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Morning laugh gags...
    1.A goat and a chicken
    were discussing and walking along the road
    side and suddenly a car passed and splash
    water on them, Angrily the chicken hissed
    and said, don't mind them' that's how they
    drive like goat, and the goat smiled and said,
    hmm' that's why they die like chicken...

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laugh it out!!
    * 3 FRIENDS LIVED IN A
    FLAT ON D 110TH FLOOR, ONE DAY D LIFT WAS
    OUT OF SERVICE & DEY HAD 2 CLIMB D STAIRS 2
    GO 2 D 110TH FLOOR. IN ORDER TO PASS TIME
    & NOT GET BORED DEY DECIDED DT THE 1ST
    PERSON SHOULD TELL A WAR STORY, THE 2ND
    A FUNNY STORY & THE 3RD A SAD STORY. THE
    1ST PERSON TELLS A WAR STORY & DEY
    CLIMBED UP 2 D 50TH FLOOR.2ND TELLS A
    FUNNY STORY & DEY CLIMBED 2 D 109TH
    FLOOR.NOW D 3RD HAD 2 TELL A VERY SAD
    STORY,HE SAID I`VE LEFT D DOOR KEY IN D CAR!

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Again!!!!
    - MATHEMATICZ LUV
    LETTER
    My Dear Luv, Yestaday, I Was
    Passin By ur
    Rectangular House
    InTrigonometric Lane.
    ... ... There I Saw u Wit ur Cute
    Circular
    Face,Conical Nose & Spherical
    Eyes,Standing In ur Triangular
    Garden.B4
    Seein u,My Heart Was A Null
    Set,
    But Wen A Vector Of Magnitude
    (Likeness) From ur
    Eyes At A Deviation Of Theta
    Radians
    Made A Tangent To My Heart,It
    Differentiated.My Luv 4 u Is A
    Quadratic
    Equation Wit Real Roots, Which
    Only u
    Can Solve By Makin Good Binary
    Relation
    Wit Me.d Cosine Of My Luv 4 u
    Extends 2
    Infinity. I Promise dat I Should
    Not Resolve
    u Partial Functions But If I Do
    So,You Can
    Integrate Me By Applyin d Limits
    From
    Zero 2 Infinity.u Are As Essential
    2 Me As
    An Element 2 A Set.The
    Geometry Of My
    Life Revolves Around ur Acute
    Personality.My Luv,If You Do Not
    Meet Me
    @ Parabola Restaurant On Date
    10 At
    Sunset,Wen The Sun Is Makin
    An
    Angle Of 160 Degrees, My Heart
    Would Be
    Like A
    Solved Polynomial Of Degree
    10.Wit Luv
    From ur Higher Order
    Derivatives Of
    Maxima&Minima,Of An
    Unknown Function.

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Again!!!!
    - MATHEMATICZ LUV
    LETTER
    My Dear Luv, Yestaday, I Was
    Passin By ur
    Rectangular House
    InTrigonometric Lane.
    ... ... There I Saw u Wit ur Cute
    Circular
    Face,Conical Nose & Spherical
    Eyes,Standing In ur Triangular
    Garden.B4
    Seein u,My Heart Was A Null
    Set,
    But Wen A Vector Of Magnitude
    (Likeness) From ur
    Eyes At A Deviation Of Theta
    Radians
    Made A Tangent To My Heart,It
    Differentiated.My Luv 4 u Is A
    Quadratic
    Equation Wit Real Roots, Which
    Only u
    Can Solve By Makin Good Binary
    Relation
    Wit Me.d Cosine Of My Luv 4 u
    Extends 2
    Infinity. I Promise dat I Should
    Not Resolve
    u Partial Functions But If I Do
    So,You Can
    Integrate Me By Applyin d Limits
    From
    Zero 2 Infinity.u Are As Essential
    2 Me As
    An Element 2 A Set.The
    Geometry Of My
    Life Revolves Around ur Acute
    Personality.My Luv,If You Do Not
    Meet Me
    @ Parabola Restaurant On Date
    10 At
    Sunset,Wen The Sun Is Makin
    An
    Angle Of 160 Degrees, My Heart
    Would Be
    Like A
    Solved Polynomial Of Degree
    10.Wit Luv
    From ur Higher Order
    Derivatives Of
    Maxima&Minima,Of An
    Unknown Function.

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laugh laugh and get tired...
    # There was this guy at
    a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like
    that for half of an hour. Then, this big
    trouble-making truck driver steps next to
    him, takes the drink from the guy, and just
    drinks it all down. The poor man starts
    crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I
    was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another
    drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
    "No, it's not that. This da...y is the worst of
    my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my
    office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I
    leave the building, to my car, I found out it
    was stolen. The police said that they can do
    nothing. I get a cab to return home, and
    when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet
    and credit cards there. The cab driver just
    drives away. " "I go home, and when I get
    there, I find my wife in bed with the
    gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar.
    And just when I was thinking about putting
    an end to my life, you show up and drink my
    poison."

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ho ho ho ho!!!

    # Pls who Cheated?
    Read this carefully.
    On a very dark night, a guy on a date parks
    and gets the girl in the back seat and they
    make love.
    ... ... The girl wants it again and the guy
    obliges
    her.
    She wants more and they do it again.. She
    still
    wants more and the guy,by now
    exhausted,says:
    "Excuse me a minute I have to relieve myself."
    While out of the car he notices a guy a half
    block away changing a flat tyre. He goes up
    to
    the guy and says;
    "Look, I've got this gal in my car and I've
    given it to her four or five times and she still
    wants more. I'll change your flat tyre if you'll
    take over for me."
    The guy agrees. He jumps into the back of
    the
    car and starts to go at it with the woman.
    He's just getting to the gravy strokes when a
    cop knocks on t he window and shines
    alight
    on them.
    The cop asks, "What are you doing in there?"
    The guy says "I'm making love to my wife."
    The cop asks, "Why don't you do that at
    home?"
    The guy answers "To tell you the truth, I
    didn't know it was my wife until you shined
    the light on her."
    So I ask again... Who cheated? the guy or the
    girl?

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laughing like u drank laugh posion..
    read carefully
    - A man lives at ABA,
    Works at OWERRI,
    and Schools at UMUAHIA.
    please tell me!
    WHERE DOES HE SPEND THE NIGHT AMONGST
    THE 3 PLACES?

    ☺LORDCASH☺ Upcoming Guru

    Member Since:
    Oct 18, 2010
    Message Count:
    282
    Likes Received:
    1
    HAHAHAHAH.....

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laughing now.....

    - Boy: wow! We met
    again
    girl: yeah
    Boy: what a coincident! We have been
    meeting in d same jamb centre,dis is d 9th
    times
    girl: yeah
    both went to d exam hall....After
    finishing,they both met outside
    ... Boy: how was d exam?
    Girl: fine oo
    Boy: ok oo byee..hope to see you again in d
    same centre next year
    girl: i reject it! No be me and u!

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    L(o)l L(o)L !!!!!
    Laugh and tire for dis one...
    - Policeman: Man, how
    and why did u kill 50 people in a car
    accident?
    Man: i was driving at about 40mph, when i
    tried to stop i found that i had no brakes. i
    saw 2 men walking on the street and a
    wedding on d other side of d street, who
    should i hit?
    Policeman: of course the 2 men,less damage.
    Man: that's what i thought to myself, but
    when i did it, i hit only one and the other one
    ran to the wedding, SO I DROVE AFTER
    HIM..lwkmd

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Lololololol lol lol... Lkwd
    laugh my/ur ass off...

    - Little junior had always wondered what
    was in between his fathers legs, so one
    day he decided to ask his mum,
    JUNIOR:  mummy what is in between
    daddys legs pls i really want to know
    MUM:      junior i dont have time for dat,
    hurry up and go to school.
    little junior went to school thinking
    about it all day long, after the bell was
    rung junior ran all the way home to ask
    his mother again, when he got home
    he smiled at what he saw and was very
    happy for knowing the answer to his
    question
    when his mum came back, she noticed
    her son was exceptionally happy and
    she decided to interrogate him
    MOM: junior why are u smiling
    JUNIOR: mum i av known the answer to
    my question
    MOM: really??? so wat is it??/
    JUNIOR: it is a toothbrush
    MOM: #laughs# toothbrush.......veery
    funny
    JUNIOR: it is not funny mom dats the
    truth, when i came back 4rm sch today
    i saw our maid kneeling down in front
    of daddy and she was brushing her
    teeth with dad's toothbrush and there
    was toothpaste in her mouth
    MOM: *faints*

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Lol dnt lol and vomit o!!!


    - As our CBN Governor
    sat down to invent Islamic Banking for
    Nigerians and the President of CAN also
    thought of Christian Banking, I have also
    taken time to conduct a survey and came up
    with Traditional Banking for Nigeria. It will
    be the simplest and yet the most secured
    and complicated way of trusting and
    keeping your money with us. The name of
    the bank nationwide will be SANGO Bank of
    Nigeria (SB...N). Your money will be
    transported spiritually to any destination of
    your choice (even abroad and overseas). OPC
    will be the chief security at all bank locations
    in the southwest, Egbesu in the south south,
    MASSOB in the southeast and Boko Haram in
    the north. No need for ATM when you can
    just sit at home and send or receive your
    money by reciting some incantation on a
    piece of red cloth stuffed in a cow horn. The
    following documents will be required to start
    banking with us immediately: (1) the beards
    of a young mosquito (2) the left last toe of a
    cockroach (3) three strains of a lion's hair (4)
    a snake's egg (5) five drums of palm oil (6)
    six yards of white cloth. We also offer
    internet banking for the yahoo fans.

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!


    Things are really
    changing fast... I remember those days as a
    child, you dare not look at your parents or
    say a word when they are scolding you. But
    these days, I see all sorts. Children are even
    getting their parents arrested. Shouldn't we
    worry about this? What is our world turning
    into?

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Lol, laugh gags are very interesting...



    - Imagine God made
    us with our noses upside down, what do
    you think will happen during a rainy season
    like this.

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ha ha ha ha, Lol lol, dis is crazyyy....


    if u no sabi song no
    sing......how person go dey sing wizkid song
    dis way......oya AXE ur mummy. lolz

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0
    EARTHLODGE

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    I go die!!!

    - a **** wants to lay
    eggs,and it is on a fence.its head facing the
    church and its back facing the mosque,if it
    lays its egg,where would the egg fall into?


    Lol... Take dis one join am!!!

    - A man buys a
    lie detector robot that slaps
    people who lie . he decided
    to test it at dinner:
    Dad: Son where were
    you today during
    schoolhours ?
    Son: At school (robot slaps son)
    Dad: Which one ?
    Son: Harry Potter (robot slaps again)
    Son: Okay I was watching pokemon.
    Dad:What? When I was your age I
    didn't even know about pokemon
    (robot slaps dad)
    Mom:Hahahaha ! after all he is your son !
    (robot slaps mom)

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0
    guy u try o

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0

    Harly wats up... Wat's Earth Lodge???

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laughing Gas:::::laughing tube::::
    This is funny...


    Boy:At last i can
    hardly wait!
    Girl: Do you want me to leave ?
    Boy: NO! don't even think about it.
    ... Girl: Do you love me?
    Boy: Ofcourse! Always
    ... Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
    Boy:NO! Why are you even asking?
    Girl:Will you kiss me?
    Boy:Every chance i get!
    Girl:Will you hit me?
    Boy:Hell no!Are you crazy
    Girl:Can i trust you?
    Boy:Yes!
    Girl:Oh my Darling!!
    For their conversation after marriage
    READ FROM THE BOTTOM BACK TO THE
    TOP...LOLZZZS

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laughing Gas:::::laughing tube::::
    This is funny...


    Boy:At last i can
    hardly wait!
    Girl: Do you want me to leave ?
    Boy: NO! don't even think about it.
    ... Girl: Do you love me?
    Boy: Ofcourse! Always
    ... Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
    Boy:NO! Why are you even asking?
    Girl:Will you kiss me?
    Boy:Every chance i get!
    Girl:Will you hit me?
    Boy:Hell no!Are you crazy
    Girl:Can i trust you?
    Boy:Yes!
    Girl:Oh my Darling!!
    For their conversation after marriage
    READ FROM THE BOTTOM BACK TO THE
    TOP...LOLZZZS

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0

    :D lol

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Harlarby read dis 5th page one!

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0
    ha ha ha u badt gan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0

    5th page ke dis thread is still in 2 pages, maybe bcos u are using mobile version as for me i am using laptop so i am viewing full version

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    U cn invite our Gurus enough browsing and enough laughing puts everytin in other... Lolz


    Take dis one too.

    A man was tired of his life, so he took a rope and put round his neck and try to hang himself on a tree, suddenly he saw a snake...
    Man shouted- oh jesus! See snake..

    Snake- no b u wan die..

    Man- No no!!! No b by snake nah... Na by rope. Lkwd...

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0

    dis one na my own o but funny sha!!!! kudos to you

    →♥♥ HALARBYâ„¢♥♥ ← Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Message Count:
    1,446
    Likes Received:
    0
    chai!!! types of death

    ☀Ã Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Message Count:
    364
    Likes Received:
    0
    Laugh it ou!!!


    - A CUTE LOVE STORY:-
    A boy had cancer and he had one month to
    live. He liked a girl who was working in a CD
    shop, but he didn't tell her about his love.
    Every day he went to the CD shop to buy a CD
    and to talk to her, but he found she never
    said anything to him .. After a month he
    died ... When the girl went to his home and
    asked after him, his mom told her that he
    had died and she took her to hi...s room,
    There she saw all the CDs were unopened....
    The girl cried and cried and finally she also
    died.... You know why? Cos she also loved
    him and she had written and kept her own
    love letters inside the CD packs! So when you
    love someone let the person know Don't
    wait for destiny to play the role..


Share This Page